Notes before reading: Here I am: I am living a Twilight free
life. Some people have told me that it’s not worth living having not read
Twilight. Some have told me to save myself and not read the book sitting
precariously on my lap at this moment. Others have said that it’s “all right, I
guess”. Well, I’m about to find out. Join me on this magical adventure of
vampires, sparkles, and avoiding the temptation of the stack of Harry Potter
books that are so close, yet so far…
DAY 1
January 24, 2009: 11:52 p.m.
Here goes nothing.
Initial thoughts: She didn’t bother to capitalize the title.
Okay. Opening the book now… A picture of trees. It’s for her big sister, Emily. That’s not very nice, is it? I doubt Emily appreciates being called big in front of such a large audience.
I’ll stop being nitpicky and try to find Chapter 1. A bible quote? The quote is, as far as I know, irrelevant, but hey. The preface seems to be irrelevant as well.
I am going to use a Harry Potter bookmark. It will raise my
spirits.
Chapter 1: 11:56 p.m. – 12:30 a.m.
“No one was going to bite me.” (pp. 14) Wow, that’s some excellent foreshadowing.
When is this chapter going to end?
“My mother is part albino.” (p. 16) That’s sarcasm? “Wow, that’s some excellent foreshadowing” would be a better example. Ugh, it’s STILL not over yet? First chapters are always tedious…
Oh, finally, it ended on the note of Bella being over-emotional and crying because some random bronze-haired hard-armed guy glared at her. I assure you I will not be joining Team Edward. A list of initial thoughts:
- That was a boring chapter, but it was only the first.
- Maybe it’s just cause I know the story, but… it seems INCREDIBLY obvious that they’re vampires.
- I get lost in the writing style. I don’t mean like, I keep turning pages and lose myself in the story… I trip over it and forget what just happened. I didn’t understand the first two pages. I think it’s because she uses too many adjectives. Meyer strikes me as a thesaurus abuser.
- Even though she’s been beating her thesaurus to death, she couldn’t come up with one other word for ‘bronze’? I GET THAT HIS HAIR IS BRONZE.
- Bella isn’t real. I’ll give her a chance, but at the moment she doesn’t seem like anyone. Maybe this is part of the book’s charm – maybe the reader is supposed to be Bella, to fill in the gaps in her personality? Maybe that makes it more likeable, but it shows lack of skill, I think. Harry Potter was real in the first (well, third, but that was his first) chapter. He didn’t have to be like me, I became like him. There we go, I’ve solved the Potter VS Twilight mystery at chapter 1 :P
Perhaps I’m judging too soon, but so far this isn’t a
page-turner. Then again, it took me a month to get past the first chapter of
Philosopher’s Stone, so I’ll plough through this one too. After I go downstairs
for a break.
Chapter 2: 12:37 – 12:58
I like Bella less now. She’s kind of, in her own word, egotistical. On the other hand, Edward is at least entertaining. He would be more entertaining if he had actual character flaws, though. I might reconsider the Team Edward thing. His ability to actually be funny kind of beats Bella’s pathetic albino attempts. I don’t know if it’s a mark of the lack of social skills on Bella’s part or just that Meyer isn’t funny, but SHE IS NOT FUNNY. And she’s trying to be. I feel bad for Mike. She’s very quick to judge him as a golden retriever and considers him kind of unfairly. All he did was be friendly, but she suddenly knows he’s obsessed with her?
It seems as if the book is saying to young girls, “don’t go for the nice guys, go for the cold insensitive ones because they’re better looking”. That doesn’t really seem like a good message.
Why is Bella psychic? She just knows that she’s the reason Edward wasn’t at school (I guess it’s just easier for Meyer to develop the plot that way?). Again, very quick to assume that everyone’s world revolves around her. But everyone’s world does revolve around her, which is the ridiculous part. It adds a sense of idealism to the book that makes it, for me, impossible to get into at this point.
It also just hit me how ludicrous it is for vampires to be going to high school. Don’t they have other things to do? It just makes the story seem like a teenager’s fantasy.
Additional thoughts: It seems to me as if Meyer is going for the modest, loveable protagonist route. It’s not working out for her. See, Bella doesn’t have any REAL problems, does she? I mean, she has two parents who seem to like her quite enough, and she has enough money, food on the table, etc. It just doesn’t work.
I get this impression from her great sacrifice to be in charge of the kitchen. See, the first time we meet Harry Potter (yes, I’m on about this again) he’s being forced to do work in the kitchen for the Dursley’s. It makes him seem modest, and charming, that he does not complain about it and just goes along with it. He’s likeable in that way. But we know that Bella is NOT modest, so she can’t pull it off.
DAY 2
January 30, 2009: 12:05 p.m.
I’m a reading addict. I told myself that I wouldn’t read anything but Twilight until I finished, and guess what? I haven’t read anything in six days. That’s how much I’m dreading this. Okay, Chapter 3, here we go.
Chapter 3: 12:06 – 12:19
Well I’ll admit that the book isn’t quite as tedious as before, but seriously. Why does the whole world revolve around Bella? Anyway, maybe it would be less obvious did I not know about the vampire thing, but I’m pretty sure it’s incredibly clear that the vampirey folks are supernatural. Seriously.
I guess I’ll keep reading *sigh*
Chapter 4: 12:21 – 12:35
I like Edward. It’s hilarious to read about Bella getting tormented by him. But she should really learn to take herself less seriously.
I can tell that Edward is going to be incredibly boring once he and Bella are together. And I’m still sick of the whole “at least one adjective per noun” rule.
Taking a break then ploughing through the next chapter, I think.
Chapter 5: 12:39 – 12:57
Bleh. That was a long chapter.
So Edward is officially only interesting when he’s not being all moody and emotional.
I can’t say I’m surprised that in the span of three
chapters, Bella has played the damsel in distress twice. It’s kind of
nauseating, but not as much as how there are now four guys fawning all over
her. Also, the fact that Edward drove her home and then got
Oh, and although I’ll admit the blood hints about Edward were clever, it’s revolting that Bella is afraid of blood. Typical, not unexpected, but revolting nonetheless.
Siiigh, time to keep reading about Bella.
Chapter 6: 1:02 – 1:17
Oh, so many boring details. I normally don’t have trouble with descriptions, but I ended up skipping all of the ones in this chapter.
No idea whether or not Bella believes that werewolves/vampires exist. That should have been addressed. If she did, that’s totally unrealistic. Also, I don’t like Bella. Have I mentioned that yet? Haha XD
I like Jacob, but Edward is funnier for the moment.
I think the story would be better if the vampires weren’t… um, vegetarians. Again, convenient and ridiculous little things that make it seem like a fantasy rather than a story.
Chapter 7: 2:20 – 2:41
BELLA IS SO STUPID.
It’s sunny. She thinks they’re vampires. They didn’t go to school.
And she doesn’t know why. Idiot.
Anyway, there are ways of revealing plot points other than dreams, but apparently since Bella is psychic if slightly dim these don’t apply. Also, she needs to get herself a good pop-up blocker. Oh, and if this was real, she would probably think she’d gone totally crazy, not that they were vampires. Also, having Bella kindly set up Mike and Jessica isn’t doing anything to make me like her more. One last thing – she tends to make men look like idiots. Honestly, this is absolutely ridiculous: Men are mindless sports-watching, car-building, controlling and dominant. Women cook and clean and whine about stupid stuff and cry all the time. Yes, this is a very good message to teach girls. Not.
And the worst part: Meyer uses way too many commas.
Chapter 8 Which Promises to be Really Boring: 2:46 – 3:07
God, Bella is irritating. And how Edward says she’s so special because she attracts trouble. As Encyclopaedia Dramatica so rightly put it, clumsiness is not a real flaw.
Anyway, I still don’t mind Edward. What I mind is the plot and how it just works out perfectly for Bella. Absolutely disgusting. But I want to know what happens now.
Chapter 9: 3:10 – 3:22
BLEH. I can’t do it anymore. I’m definitely done for the day.
Anyway, I’m glad the vampire thing is out but it wasn’t done very well. And I’m so SICK of Bella being all tragic. What does she have to be tragic about? Nothing, is the answer you are searching for. Absolutely nothing.
Meh. Edward isn’t funny anymore, which is a let down. I was just starting to like him, too. And Bella is sickening. I need to start looking up more words to describe that. Disgusting, nauseating and revolting just don’t cut it.
Speaking of which, Meyer keeps throwing in all these crappy enormous words which sound totally unnatural. And I have no idea what they mean, but don’t care enough to look them up. So no, I don’t know what her Macbeth essay (or paragraph) was about. You’re not supposed to try to confuse your readers, you know.
Day 3: Saturday, January 31, 2009: 1:32 p.m.
Because I just have nothing better to do…
Chapter 10: 1:33 – 1:49
Does Meyer actually think that a girl’s boyfriend is supposed to think she’s absolutely perfect in every way?
That’s just a tad unrealistic…
Bella is possibly the most irritating character I’ve had the displeasure of reading about. Edward is alright, though. If he weren’t so smitten, he might be my favourite character. Unfortunately this is not the case.
Come on, Edward. Have a backbone.
Chapter 11: 1:52 – 2:09
That’s enough for today.
Still like Edward, still dislike Bella. Jacob just turned up. It’s a bit weird that he’s only 15…
I’m waiting for the sparkling and the “I watch you every night” crap to come out. It sounds entertaining.
If you get more than 30 I strongly recommend some counseling!
IF you get more than 20 you’re paranoid.
If you get 10-20 then u are normal.
If you get 10 or less you’re fearless.
People who don’t have any are full of shit!
I Fear…
[x] the dark
[ ] staying single forever
[ ] being a parent
[x] giving birth
[x] being myself in front of others
[ ] open spaces
[ ] closed spaces
[ ] heights
[ ] black cats
[ ] dogs
[ ] birds
[ ] fish
[x] spiders
[ ] flowers or other plants
[x] being touched
[x] fire
[x] deep water
[ ] lakes
[ ] silk
[x] the ocean
[ ] failure
[x] success
[x] thunder/lightning
[ ] frogs/toads
[ ] my boyfriends/girlfriends dad
[ ] my boyfriends/girlfriends mom
[ ] mice/rats
[x] jumping from high places
[ ] snow
[ ] rain
[ ] wind
[x] crossing hanging bridges
[x] death
[ ] heaven
[x] being robbed
[x] falling
[ ] clowns
[x] large crowds of people
[ ] men
[ ] women
[x] having great responsibilities
[ ] doctors, including dentists
[x] tornadoes
[x] hurricanes
[x] incurable diseases
[ ] snakes
[ ] sharks
[ ] Friday the 13th
[x] ghosts
[ ] poverty
[ ] Halloween
[ ] school
[x] trains
[ ] odd numbers
[ ] even numbers
[ ] being alone
[ ] becoming blind
[ ] becoming deaf
[x] growing up
[x] monsters under my bed (as in scary people)
[x] creepy noises in the night
[x] bee stings
[ ] not accomplishing my dreams/goals
[ ] needles
[ ] blood
[ ] dinosaurs if they were alive
[ ] the welcome mat
[x] high speeds
[x] throwing up
[x]falling in love
My Total: 28
POST IT WITH THE SUBJECT:
“I fear __ out of 70 common
